“I can’t go to school. My stomach hurts.”
By Tamilyn White, LPC, Behavioral Health Therapist
Sometimes children really do have stomach ailments. But what does it mean when a kiddo complains about feeling sick, but rest, medicine, and doctors don’t find anything physically off?
The Brain-Body Connection
Although we sometimes talk as if our minds and bodies are two separate parts, there is a strong connection between them. We can slow our heart rate by focusing on breathing slowly. Some people can change their body temperature and blood pressure by thinking calming thoughts. Our brains are so powerful that they release biochemical pain “medicines” many times stronger than morphine when we get injured. Similarly, when we are in danger, our brain shuts down nonessentials like decision-making, planning for the future, and digesting our last meal in favor of things that will help us survive: getting a lot of oxygen to our muscles so we can run or fight, dilating our pupils to take in more light and allow sharper vision, and focusing all energy on protection.
When we experience a lot of stressful things, our brain can get stuck in survival mode.
This is where those sore tummy complaints begin. Our bodies are not built for constant stress. When school feels scary, bodies respond just as they do to other threats, and that feels like being sick—like having a headache and a sick stomach.
Helping Children Feel Safe Again
We can help these kiddos unstick from survival mode by inviting them to share their worries and listening to their concerns. Being heard is a powerful connection that counters stress and settles the brain.
One quick and easy exercise that can slow anxious breathing and settle activated worries is Soup Breathing. Taking a deep breath in through the nose, we imagine smelling the soup. Pursing the lips and exhaling softly, we cool the soup. Repeat Soup Breathing a few times until that anxious brain cools off too. Teaching children to recognize signs of stress and some things they can do to feel better is a valuable skill they can take with them anywhere.
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Tamilyn White, LPC, NCC, is a behavioral health therapist for NorthLakes Community Clinic in Hayward, Wisconsin, where everyone is served, regardless of their ability to pay, ensuring that all residents of northern Wisconsin have access to quality healthcare.
